Here i am again...all because i had a thought late last night. Who the hell made these guidelines about what being love should be like? It's really messed up. i mean NONE of the people i know have had the 'happily ever after'....it's always with some ifs and buts. The 'happily-ever-after' IF at all it happens is never unconditional. And why do we not see the beauty of all kinds of messed up love around?
M and i are back together in a very messed up way. We aren't dating, we aren't even making out or having sex. We just lie together in bed and feel complete. Then, in the morning we put on our masks and go our way as strangers.
We are just together in a very forbidden way, none of his people know about me and none of mine even know that we are in touch. We are in love and probably will be forever. i am hanging out with other boys and he is banging other girls but at the end of the day, we hang our coats in each other's heart-shaped home.
When we are together it all feels complete, but we cannot imagine giving this relationship a name, at least i can't. i won't even try. You see, when you try to put your love in a labelled box, you close yourself off to many unexplained emotions, feelings and experiences. He's not a friend cuz he's hurt me too much to be called one. Yet, he's more than a friend because our souls open up to eachother like no other. He's not a lover because i don't plan on a future with him and yet, he's more than lover because we do love each other more than anybody can imagine.
Yet, there's a painful snag in this system. When you are making your own rules, there is no acceptable way to solve your problems.
Sayonara
*__*
M and i are back together in a very messed up way. We aren't dating, we aren't even making out or having sex. We just lie together in bed and feel complete. Then, in the morning we put on our masks and go our way as strangers.
We are just together in a very forbidden way, none of his people know about me and none of mine even know that we are in touch. We are in love and probably will be forever. i am hanging out with other boys and he is banging other girls but at the end of the day, we hang our coats in each other's heart-shaped home.
When we are together it all feels complete, but we cannot imagine giving this relationship a name, at least i can't. i won't even try. You see, when you try to put your love in a labelled box, you close yourself off to many unexplained emotions, feelings and experiences. He's not a friend cuz he's hurt me too much to be called one. Yet, he's more than a friend because our souls open up to eachother like no other. He's not a lover because i don't plan on a future with him and yet, he's more than lover because we do love each other more than anybody can imagine.
Yet, there's a painful snag in this system. When you are making your own rules, there is no acceptable way to solve your problems.
Sayonara
*__*
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